Email scams? Must be an election year
A flurry of emails from people with names like Mr. Nyejiowanaka Gogo, Mr. Bangu Mali and Mr. Kabore Umaru have informed me that all I need to do to collect is to provide all my personal information.
Mr. Gogo — a creative enough name but it would have been more believable if he had called himself Mr. Whiskey A. Gogo or Mr. Wakemeupbeforeu Gogo — is particularly adamant about getting my name, cell phone number, age, sex, occupations, city and country. If I provide that information, I can take home 40 percent of $25 million that was left to him by a relative who died in a plane crash in 2000.
Mr. Mali, on the other hand, went so far as to identify the relative in his email, one Andreas Schranner, who along with his wife died in what we left to assume must have been a different plane crash, this one on July 31, 2000. Neither Mr. Gogo nor Mr. Mali reveal the details of where the aforementioned tragedy occurred. (A Google search reveals that Mr. Schranner and his wife did perish in a tragic Concorde plane crash from Germany to New York that killed all 109 people aboard.)
But Mr. Mali, that shyster, is only offering 35 percent of $10.15 million.
Mr. Umaru is offering a 60/30 split on $10.8 million — again from the same plane crash — but is deducting the remaining 10 percent for his expenses. In addition to all the other personal information, he also wants my address.
And then there is Ms. Judy Jones, who would like to give me $1 million pounds from a United Kingdom National Lottery promotion. Ms. Jones isn’t asking for any personal information yet, but apparently I didn’t even have to buy a lottery ticket to win. The winner is chosen through a free email drawing.
These are all fun names being used on old email scams. But apparently some people think other people are stupid and gullible and that’s why these emails keep popping up. And with an election in November — which features a bevy of unqualified mopes and mopettes running for elected offices across several states who have been bamboozling the citizenry — they may just be right.